Final Arrangements

PAGE 4 • JUNE 2013 Final Arrangements M arriage is forever, and for many couples, the final symbol of a shared life is a shared resting place. "Togetherness is what marriage is really all about," says Rabbi Alan Green, senior rabbi at Winnipeg's Shaarey Zadek Synagogue. "If you look at a long-married couple, how many things have they done together in life? They live together, they eat together." And most couples, he adds, also feel it's important to be buried together. Until recently, most Jewish men and women married to a non-Jewish spouse had to make a difficult choice — forgo a traditional Jewish burial so they could be laid to rest alongside their spouse, or be buried according to custom in a Jewish cemetery, but without their life partner. But on Jan. 30, 2012, Shaarey Zadek Synagogue opened Shaarey Shamayim Interfaith Jewish Cemetery to serve Jewish people and their non- Jewish spouses. Shaarey Shamayim — Hebrew for gates of heaven — is one of the first cemeteries of its kind in Canada, and it serves a growing need. "These days, many Jewish families are interfaith families, meaning a Jewish man married to a non-Jewish woman or a Jewish woman married to a non-Jewish man," Green says. "However, very often the non-Jew is supporting or sustaining the Jewish life even if not Jewish themselves. They may be raising their children as Jewish or supporting Jewish causes. So naturally, they want to be buried with their Jewish spouse." Since traditional Jewish burial has been strictly limited to Jewish people in years past, accommodating interfaith burials is still new and requires sensitivity and respect for all concerned. The interfaith cemetery had to balance traditional Jewish burial requirements with the needs of non-Jewish spouses, and create an atmosphere that is receptive and comforting to all mourners. Rabbi Green led a research team composed of clergy members at Congregation Shaarey Zadek which looked at best practices among Jewish communities in North America. Jewish community leaders were also consulted before a detailed policy and procedure manual was produced. Jewish individuals laid to rest in Shaarey Shamayim can still have a traditional Jewish burial, which includes rituals such as saying the Kaddish, the Jewish prayer for the dead, and the K'riah, tearing one's clothes or a black ribbon to symbolize the tear in the mourner's heart. Non- Jewish individuals buried alongside their spouses will be given a non- denominational service at burial. Shaarey Shamayim is located in a separate, fenced-in area in the larger Shaarey Zadek Cemetery on Armstrong Avenue, just across Main Street from Kildonan Park. The original cemetery was established in the early 20th century and has undergone significant upgrades such as improved roads, traffic flow measures and irrigation systems. The historic grounds are beautifully landscaped and carefully maintained, and they are dedicated to all the Jewish victims of the First World War and the Second World War. To maintain tradition regarding the adjoining Shaarey Zedek Cemetery, the interfaith cemetery is surrounded by a roadway and a wrought-iron fence. It has its own separate entrance and gate. Rabbi Green says about six burials have taken place since Shaarey Shamayim opened, but he notes that the need for the cemetery will increase significantly in future years. Shaarey Zadek estimates that up to 70% of Jewish individuals in Winnipeg are marrying spouses of another religion. And while couples planning their weddings may not think about making final arrangements, they're an unavoidable reality that all couples must face one day. Having a final resting place where they can be buried together as husband and wife and according to their respective faiths is a great relief. Shaarey Zadek also offers pre- planning services. Till death do us part? By Kathryne Cardwell For the Free Press Shaarey Shamayim Cemetery gives interfaith couples peace of mind Rabbi Alan Green at Shaarey Shamayim Interfaith Jewish Cemetery. In Hebrew, Shaarey Shamayim means gates of heaven. Photo: Darcy Finley For more information, call 204-452-3711 or see www.shaareyzadek.mb.ca. • Adherence to a Code of ethics. ethics. • Current information on Provincial and Federal assistance. • Provide educational opportunities to our members that equip them in assisting familes. • Accountability with the Funeral Service the Funeral Service Profession. • Work to protect the quality of service in your community. FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF MFSA MEMBERS CHECK OUR WEBSITE: www.mfsa.mb.ca 610 - 55 GARRY ST.WINNIPEG,MB R3C 4H4 TEL: 204-947-0927 | EMAIL: mfsa63@gmail.com THE MANITOBA FUNERAL SERVICE ASSOCIATION IS A NON-PROFIT ASSOCIATION SERVING FUNERAL DIRECTORS AND FUNERAL HOMES ACROSS THE PROVINCE OF MANITOBA.THE M.F.S.A.IS DEDICATED TO THE ADVANCEMENT OF FUNERAL SERVICE THROUGH SUPPORT TO THE PUBLIC AND INDIVIDUAL MEMBERS. WHY CHOOSE AN MFSA MEMBER?

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